Pictorial review of 'Kanda Naal muthal'

So I came across this really funny blog by Imaan Sheikh where she basically does a pictorial rewind of Bollywood movies.And I thought it would be hilarious if someone did the same with our very own(and extremely tacky) Tamil movies. So heyho!I decided to take the initiative to attempt the deed.And here it is!Amateurish attempt so don't get your hopes high. Pictorial rewind of today is ....*drum rolls* 'KANDA NAAl MUTHAL' So basically our film starts out in a wedding,where our 2 star-crossed lovers meet.

 So in case you were expecting the above, you're wrong.Because instead, we see two bickering midgets..... I mean kids.Krishna,the small man to the right and ramya-kutty,the other small thing to the left.
   
  COME AT ME BRO! SHUDDUP YOU HOE! 

So fast-forward a few years later and we see Krishna the midget as a grown-ass man still in college. And not forgetting,hitting on girls...which is an improvement as compared to hitting girls,like he used to not too long ago.
   
That's my sister, bruhhh

And Ramya-no-more-kutty is now an annoying whiny motormouth. Who can apparently also talk to dogs.

 
So coincidentally, both of them get to meet at Krishna's college cultural meet. Krishna is supposed to take care of transportation for the schools coming down.However,Krishna,being the dipshit he is,messes up and sends an animal van instead of a normal bus.Because being the chairman of the committee and not being able to do the simplest of shit is apparently Krishna's forte.
  

 So Ramya gets infuriated at Krishna's inability to do almost everything and the both of them lock horns during their first meeting.

   

So during the culturals,our hero finally manages to figure out that the annoying,self-righteous Ramya was none other than the midget that attacked him when he was younger..

And Ramya who finds out the truth as well,wants to badly murder his entire family.

Fast forward a few more years later and Ramya wants nothing better than to murder her entire family.Why?Because her little sister is shit that's why. Little shit loves someone and wants to marry him but being the wimp she is, she's afraid to ask her parents and seeks help from Ramya instead.

And Miss Iamveryresponsible goofs up when she implies that there should be a marriage taking place at home. Everyone else except her stupid sister (who could've opened her mouth and come out with the truth) assumes that Ramya has wishes to get married and get started finding a suitable groom.Who happens to be Krishna's best friend.

 Who by the way tries to reason out of marrying by giving stupid reasons.

 Krishna finds out that his best friend is going to be stuck with Ramya for the rest of his life and now tries to talk his best friend out of marrying her.
   
 However,not wanting to ruin a girl's life,he stops talking shit about her and tries to help her instead. Which our Miss Motormouth misconstrues. Shit brews and eventually she's rejected. And also her little shit..I mean sister elopes with her boyfriend.Which causes her mum a heart attack.And according to Ramya,everything is Krishna's fault including Hurricane Katrina. Krishna tries to chase after her and explain.Heck, he even pays for her mum's hospital bills and pretends to be Ramya's fiance (aka his best friend) over the phone to save the mum from another heart attack.
  
 And before you know it,lo and behold...they start liking each other.Which seemed next to impossible before this.They hang out every single day. And dude even punches the living lights out of Ramya's boss who tried to jalpa with her.



   THEY EVEN HUG.

  
 Guess who decides to confess her love? Ramya.
   And just when things are going right, Mr shit-stirrer,aka Krishna's best friend decides to marry her.Because some people are fickle-minded but others are just assholes who can't decide. And Ramya decides to go along with it...or at least she pretends to. Which riles up our hero because he can't let his dipshit of a best friend to take his girl.So he rants about what a selfish poophead his bf is and why she shouldn't marry him.Which his best friend(WHO IS STANDING RIGHT BESIDE,I MEAN RLY?) hears.Ooopsie dooopsie doo!
  

 And then the truth is unravelled . To which le bestie gives in and the raging ramya does this.(Look at the shithead laughing when rightfully he should be slapped)
  
 A hug and a few tears later..
.
   And everyone lives happily ever after of course!

All praises to Blu Tack

So it's been 3 months since I got braces. The first few days was not good for me. I predicted that it would be Satan's personal brand of hell for me but like my dentist said I was just over-thinking.He never fails to tell me that every damn visit mainly because it's true. The hardest part was the fooooooood. I lost weight the first week(as if being almost skeletal wasn't enough)due to extreme discomfort in my mouth. I see myself as someone who has a pretty low tolerance for pain but hey I was eating briyani by the 3rd day and biting into burgers by that week. There were fleeting moments of regret because I didn't exactly want it. I was just succumbing to the pressure of my mum.

(TEETH NO STRAIGHT=YOU NO HUSBAND) So anyways I was and still am getting used to it. I did not feel anything that could possibly make me cringe in pain.However, I have to say, the metal brackets are shit-assed bastards. I'm not sure why the manufacturers of the metal brackets can't for god's sake blunt the edges of these metal shitheaded brackets AKA razorsharp-katana-i'll f*ckin kill you-bladesofhorror. I was given dental wax the day my 4 calcified friends were extracted by the dentist's very reliable plier. That packet of dental wax were my good comrades for the following weeks to come. If not for them my inner cheeks would have been scraped inside out. So anyways, my inner cheeks got used to the metal brackets and I was doing fine.Even after my second appointment.

That is UNTIL my 3rd appointment came by. It was the biggest mistake to have not stocked up on more dental wax because I was under the assumption that since I've survived the whole of the 2nd month without my trusty dental wax I could go on without it for the remaining period. It started out as light grazes and by the end of the day I had deep cuts in my inner cheeks. The brackets were digging deeeeep and kept getting stuck to the flesh of my cheeks and pulled them apart. I-was-in-pain.

I couldn't sleep and everytime I opened my mouth or so little as pursed my lips,the brackets were anchoring itself even deeper into my wounded cheeks. I went scouring the whole of Yishun to get my hands on Dental wax.I went all the way to the pharmacies at Northpoint to be told that only dentists carry dental wax. F**k this shit,I thought and went to the dental clinics nearby. Unfortunately,they don't do braces and no dental wax for me.When I finaaaaally chanced upon a dental clinic which does braces...it was closed.

Desperate times called for desperate measures and I brainstormed.What would be the perfect substitute for dental wax?Gum?But I don't have access to gum.Plasticine?Ugh no way. Blu-Tack? WAIT!Blu-tack is perfect! So yes I did buy Blu-tack because I couldn't care less about anything else and just wanted to stop the agony. I felt relief flooding in as I stuck wads of Blu-tack on my brackets.

BluTack has 1000's of uses and apparently acting as replacement of dental wax is one of them. Who knew. Anyways, I managed to get dental wax the next day but I must say Blu tack was an even better cushion than dental wax. ALL PRAISES TO BLU TACK

All hail Amala Paul

I have always wanted to blog about this phenomena I am about to blog about. I never really got around to blogging it due to my recent, tightly packed schedule. So enough beating around the bush, I am already getting hyped up,straaaaaaaight to the topic yaar. ∂єєριкα ρα∂υкσηє + ρяιуαηкα ¢нσρяα = αмαℓα ραυℓ So it can unequivocally be assured that if Piggy chops/Priyanka Chopra and Deeps/Deepika Appunene Padukone had a lovechild, it would be no other than.........

HAUUUUUNNNNN..... Ahem.. So let us dissect her facial anatomies to conclude what makes her so intriguingly similar to both these actresses. Intriguing because if I put Priyanka and Deeps side by side, I wouldn't be able to spot any similarities,sure as hell. Besides their dusky skin tone,zilch similarities.

See ^ no similarities right? So how come the ballyhoo on amala paul looking like em both? Well let's start further analysing. Amala has a ROOOOUND face. Priyanka chopra is the epitome of round face,I mean it's like Brahma took the template of the moon and created her face. Well let's see what else makes her look like Pee Cee. Both of them have got pouty, thick lips. I think it's pretty much,the fleshy face and other details which contributes to their physical similarity. When they wear their hair in the same manner complementing their round face, it atrributes to the resemblance. Here is an exemplary picture where they could bloody well be twinnies .

WOAH Doppelgänger ALERT! (even captain is shaaacked)

Now, let's move on to Deepika Padukone. Okay this is where I am going to talk about the two types of teams that exist when deciding who Amala Paul does look like. I have met people who steadfastedly claim that Amala Paul resembles Priyanka chopra more. Then there's the team which loyally 'stands in one leg'(translate to Tamil) that Amala Paul resembles Deepika closely.

Personally, I think that Amala bears a closer resemblance to Deepika Padukone. And here are the reasons WHY I think so.Starting out with the obvious, BOTH have dimples.Though Am's has one-sided dimple and Deepika's dimples appear on both cheeks and are deeper. They also share the same BIG eyes. Remember Deepika's enchanting eyes in 'Om Shanti Om'? According to Wiki, Amala Paul's eyes were so alluring in her 'Deiva Thirumagal' scenes,that film critics loved her. To be more specific, this is what was told "her expressive eyes help her leave a mark in a small but important role". So there... it can be resolutely said that they both have uh...eye-catching eyes! So there's the other similarity. To sum it all up in an image,see below. I bet there are other photographs which would better highlight their likeness buuuuut this is the best I could do.

So there you go! If you happen to strongly think she looks like either PC or Deeps, please calm you tits. I mean after all, she is Quasi Priyanka Quasi Deepika. To conclude this post,I would like to say that I would love to see more of Amala Paul. I mean she's just a year older than me and her screen presence is already so sizzling;) Like that 15 year old kid who I overheard saying to his friend," I dunno how to put it da,there's just something about her,She's like ...special", I also think that way. I also strongly believe that she would go a LOOOOOONG way. She's already endorsing quite a number of brands. There was the wave of 'Tamannah','Nayanthara','Shreya'which ebbed away. I think the current fad girls are 'Hansika' and 'Kajal'.Though I like Kajal or loved her at one point of time, I don't really find anything outstanding about her now. Being a Tollywood fan, I ensured that I saw all her movies but now I dunno man....DIGRESSING!Okay point is,let's just pray that Amala Paul's here to stay. Before I say Taa-Taa ,here is a photo spam of my A-mallu Paul.

'Pizza' Tamil movie Review

So this post would be my thoughts on the Tamil movie 'Pizza'. I happened to watch the teaser trailers while lazing on my couch last Sunday afternoon. It was made on a shoestring budget and raked in many positive reviews as well as $$. So when I was watching snippets of the movie being shown on TV, it got me interested, However, it wasn't compelling enough to make me want to watch it. The screenplay seemed terse and somehow,laconic. The teaser gave me the idea that 'Pizza' was a 'horror movie told in an artsy way' kind of film. But thank goodness, I watched it yesterday on DVD. No wonder, the film received many rave reviews.

It was a pleasant surprise and refreshing to watch. I realised that I couldn't leave my seat. The movie though of horror/thriller genre,lulled me to a stillness. Heck, even my parents and I were calmly seated at our couches watching the plot unravel.

There were unexpected twists in the movie.What was made to be a convincing story actually reveals to be something more. A combination of both horror and interesting plot, the movie was a deviation from the normal psychological thriller type. During the movie, I was already making up theories and several plausible endings in my head. But none,I tell you was close enough to how it really ended.The last scene though was an irony and I found it funny. Don't want to say too much or this review have to be renamed 'Pizza' Spoilers.

What I like about this movie was that, it didn't have to have sleazy scenes or raunchy dance numbers to promote it. The story itself,does more justice.Though I think the screenplay and the narration could have been improved on, it is an appreciable attempt by debutant director,Karthik Subbaraju.It is being remade in Bollywood and there are talks that Hollywood producers might make an adaptation of the film. Our thalaivar,Sir Rajini Kanth was impressed by the movie as well.So you do the math. All in all, an interesting movie, a GOOD watch! I suggest you go rent it as soon as possible or borrow it or whatever. Just watch. My ratings... 3.8/5

Annoying train commuters .

WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY YOU HAVE NEVER EXPERIENCED AN IRRITANT IN THE MRT?impossibruuuu.I hate to rant and harp on bad experiences because I have complained countless times about the irksome ways of some Singaporeans I have faced in the train.You know, instead of making that local movie on 'Old Changi Hospital',they should have made a film on the daily happenings of a SMRT train commuter. Emotions run high when you pack all these 'Kancheong spiders'in the miniscule cabins. You know I can clearly be classified under the 'Peaceful,avoid all alta bulta fights'..that kinda Jilpa category.But...le wild shoving aunty appears in the cabin and..POOF!

My patience dissipates. Enough COMPLAINING!We need to take action!I am Indian and action is my middle name yaar.

SEE!Hearing this,Namma Action King Arjun pongi vilugiraar! Anyways, it didn't take much time for me to reach a solution. Understanding that Singaporeans acclimatize to things easily,things as in laws,rules,rise in GST/Tax etc due to their fear towards authority(The Gahmen); I thought..hey why not bring in an authoritive figure who controls this 'Annoying SMRT commuters' phenomena?! But NO ,my thought process didn't halt there, I needed to know WHO,just exactly WHO is sooo POWERFUL,AUTHORITVE AND BOLD TO JUMP INTO TRAINS AND PUNISH THE MISDOER ? And vaat a miracles of ridicules! The answer came to my mind like mattapu! HEY YOU!Yes you there,you DINKILONA

You have been A BAD BAD TINKERINZZ COMMUTER. Every child drinks his mother's milk when born BUT YOU!YOU MUST HAVE DRUNK DECOCTION TO BE SO IRRITATING

STOP IT I SAY! THE FINGERS YOU NOW SEE OUTSTRETCHED TO SAY STOP WILL HIT YOU IN THE FACE LIKE GUSTHI BULLFIGHT IF I SEE YOU BEING AN UNCOOPERATIVE COMMUTER IN THE TRAIN.

Don't you think this would solve the praablem? If you think T Rajender the Train Terminator is still not good enough, there is PLAN B which is resorting the guilty to watch naked not-so-amul baby pictures of Captain VijayaKanth

Till then we vill meet.vill meet..meet